10:48 p.m. x 2002-10-01

i have been feeling 4th grade again.

WHY?!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!

for all the plausible reasons there are...i've been feeling neglected by my really close friends lately. particularly sara...we just don't seem to jell anymore. i bet she blames it on jason. rachel's blown me off quite a few times lately. i miss being around manda more...i never see brittany now, and she's been in a rough spot lately...jaypea's been making me happy though...*hugs the void of jaypea-ness*. i got to be with him in resource today. just sitting and talking to someone who likes me and having them listen contently was really great and really what i needed today.

i promised myself i'd find jaypea a boyfriend this year...this woul require me learning his *type*...which i wil slowly worm out of him in a long and involved process of prodding and annoying that i'm all too familiar with...

...i know everybody's type but mine @_@!

rachel has a crush on the student teacher in my french class...mr. depeyer. that's pretty funny. i dunno...while he isn't my type...it is rachel. we'll give her that. she even wrote a song for him. sing along, kiddie winkies:

mr. depeyer!
i wanna touch your hair!
are you wearing underwhere?
mr. depeyer!
mr. depeyer!
see that cantalope over there?
mr. depeyer!
mr. depeyer!

...woohoo...that was rousing. i feel motivated to go in my room and watch the monkees now...but i won't because as i said, i'm feeling 4th grade again, thus my childhood fear of mike nesmith has been plauging me.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)