satanic orgies will ensew

9:15 p.m. x 2003-04-28

i just ate four whole garlic pickles and am proceeding to drink a medium-warm diet coke. why? because i want a weird dream. just a few nights ago, i had a dream so real and normal that it scared the living shit out of myself and teddy. it all began in a very "breakfast club"-esque library, and everyone i knew was there. and i was talking to a someone (who - you can think what you like), and then suddenly i was in the mall with manda. she was wearing a red vinyl dress that i saw her try on one time at hot topic, and we were talking about our plans for this weekend, and i got this horrible realistic saddness that she was lying and couldn't do any of what she said she would.

to the best of my knowledge - our plans for this weekend (which are important) are on, but our plans for this past weekend did fail...which i suppose i let upset me more than it should have. i'm just in a very strange spot...it may be PMS, but i'm the kind of individual that gets it rare enough that my therapist gets concerned about the mood swings. ^-^ i love never getting monthly personality issues...i'm already confusing enough as is.

*sips the warm coke* AND TODAY IT WAS DONE...at last i ordered *drumroll* THE QUEEN ADREENA ALBUMS!!! yaaay! yes - my pre-birthday shopping is pseudocompleted, soon to be followed by the birthday spending binge with manda and the post-birthday aftershock of brian hugh warner's "the golden age of grotesque" (but why?...why on a tuesday...?).

i am a taurus. i spend. a lot.

it is true that possessions are not the most important thing in life - but if i walked up to you with a brand new dvd player, you'd smile, no matter how much of a coldhearted douchebag you are.

EXCELLENT WAY TO SOME UP MY STATE-OF-MIND: today i brought sara's birthday gift to school, and she was not there. i carried the strange little baggie of giftlettes all day, and really...it wasn't even her birthday.

that's such a me thing to do, you know.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11