You gave me hyacinths first a year ago. They called me the hyacinth girl.

i love the cold. reading alex's diary made me want to jump outside and curl up in my yard and gradually loose the sensation of possessing limbs. i may complain a little like everyone else, but really...i kind of like it. so weird.

interlude - i wish i had a job. i wish i didn't live here. i wish i was in college. i wish i lived on my own. i wish i was in a good amount of control over something. GRR.

it looks as though i won't be able to get psychology & sociology my senior year. not at the high school, anyway. there's a way to take it at a nearby community college, and i'm apparently qualified. so i'll look into that. THAT, and my failure to be able to maintain any kind of respectable grade in the left-brain arenas, has also left gaping holes in my schedule for both this year and the next. i can't take chemistry or physics, so instead this year i'm taking science and society and next year...i have possibly four more classes i could me taking. this is what i'm thinking...(they should add up to eight)

government (full credit), parenting (half-credit), statistics (half-credit), and english IV (full credit), cartooning (half-credit), advanced foods (half-credit), 2D art II (half-credit), 3D art II (half-credit), advanced portfolio (half-credit), 20th century art history (half-credit), the DREADED GYM (half-credit), independant study possibly? (half-credit)...and i need two more half-credits to add up to a schedule. i could, now that i think about it, retake alg 2 and that would not only get me out of summerschool but put me in normal stats. hmm...

it's something to ponder. if i am able to get that schedule, i'd never get out of the art room. but at least i'd know i'll have a nice looking average that year. i'm pretty good at maintaining a good grade in art class (i did manage to get a 62 in art one year, but that was eigth grade, and that explains itself). i need a nice average somewhere. that, a nice SAT score (which i'm confident about), and a nice portfolio. and at least then i'll be able to get into an art college. SOMETHING.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)