You gave me hyacinths first a year ago. They called me the hyacinth girl.

i dropped a 100 lb weight on my foot today, and then i plaster-casted heather's arm. the plaster was sooo thick that i had to carve it open with a knife. that was pretty harrowing. almost as harrowing was hobbling up the hill between the weight room and the high school, lagging the victim around. nothing is broken, i believe, and i can move around, but my mom sincerely wants to take me to the hospital. if i went, it would just be to go and not be elsewhere.

kind of like when it happened, when i dropped the 100 lb weight on my foot, i screamed "FUCK!" really loudly, but only because i had dropped this weight on my foot and it was as good a time as any, if i were to scream and swear, that i do so. so i did. but i could've done otherwise. ideally, i should've just gone about my business and claimed that i always limped, just no one ever noticed, and deal with it in my own way. i've noticed that i don't really like it when people freak out and i can't sway them to handle things a certain way. i think i like controlling others' reactions.

AH, this does hurt though. and most definitely merits a resounding "FUCK!".

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)