surrounded by the color blue

9:45 p.m. x 2006-05-08

1
i went with amber w to get her tattoo today! it was super extreme short notice, because i thought it was tomorrow and i didn't even know if i could get there, but she wanted me there so badly she came and picked me up! i hung out with her in the tattooing cubicle for somewhere circa 3-4 hours while she had a cherry blossom branch tattooed on her back, by her left shoulder. it's a masterpiece and looks so gorgeous on her! i was so touched that she wanted me there and i was proud to go. amber is a beautiful person.

2
WHOA.

how ugly of you. how thoroughly repulsive and rude and exploitative. you are as unhappy as you are for a reason. stay the hell away from my friend.

my family's singing happy birthday to my sister without me cause they don't like me. bah. college, ahoy. enough of this bullshit. ALL OF IT. i'm so happy to largely not be involved. i'm so happy to get out.

no matter how it feels sometimes i know that when it is good it is very very good but when it is bad it is horrid. and somewhere it isn't that way, and i'd be cheating myself out of that way if i stayed here and waited for the minute flashes of good.

...

i am alone, surrounded by the colour blue
inside a poem, the only words i ever knew
washing my hands of the many years untold
for now i am banned, my future it's to unfold
would you take my candlelight
would you take my candlelight
would you take my candlelight
away from me
i am blind
my eyes are covered from the outside
for i have lied, now all there is left for me
to do is hide
take in a deep
breath, i lift my head
for i am a new man
and i arise from my bed
this is all there is, i can see that now
i have to be careful with it, now it's been found
so fragile, but powerful, this is the light
of my destiny stay with me, through every night

imogen heap, "candlelight"

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11