10:42 p.m. x 2006-05-20

i spend large parts of my day today not feeling too well and google-imaging pictures of "arson". then i cried. i'd been trying to cry for the past few weeks and hadn't and it was driving me out of my mind. then i read someone else's dland, and it made me cry. it wasn't a great cry, it wasn't what i was going for...i wanted balls-out sobbing, whailing, aching...i wanted my makeup to be totally wrecked and for me to pass out. but i just sniffled and shed a tear. fairly disappointing, but it was something. a relief.

i also sneezed on my shirt and didn't realize it until i was out on a walk, and then i noticed and then jimmy honked at me and i was so perplexed all i could do was throw him the peace sign. yeah...strange day. dye is still coming out of my hair in the bathtub, and i'm going to call the salon about that. water tastes funny. my nailpolish reminds me of jeffree star: internet royalty.

i'm losing my mind.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)