there are many things that i would like to say to you

8:55 p.m. x 2006-12-19

it isn't even an issue. i wish i could talk about it. i feel like the minute i open my mouth it will become not worth talking about.

if i call the person i'd like to it will get twisted. it will be met with delusional, misinterpreted, and that would not be what i would be addressing. what you do is your business. i'm talking about how i feel.

and if i say it to the person who makes me feel better no matter what, i think it will be taken very much the wrong way. and no matter what will be responded to with "i told you."

i think for a minute that i'm too sensitive about how i'm spoken to. then i think that when you only have speaking with someone...

meh. ambivalence. my day was kind of splotchy. i'm glad clare's back but she didn't want me to spend the night with she and elisa. even after my mom bitched me out on the phone and i cried. and then i went home and she called and she didn't care at all about what she had been fucking freaking out about earlier. and i really really wanted to see jimmy but his place of employment was too crowded.

i don't know. i don't know. FUCK.

i'm so angry.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11