i dress myself like a charcoal sketch

6:33 p.m. x 2007-03-03

my place of employment is on the line. i'm checking whether or not i work tomorrow, and it's taking a small eternity. yargh.

i was out getting a componant of jimmy's birthday gift today and i tried on shirts. it wasn't an awesome experience. i do like what i got jimmy, though, and according to ernie, "he'll enjoy the shit out of that". i'm excited.

sailor neptune is on my layout, by the way. in case it sailed past you.

anyhow, with regards to the aformentioned gift, jimmy and i shared this exchange last night:

kari: i hope you fondle it at night and think about me
jimmy: i fondle everything at night thinking about you

that was cool. also cool - EXTREMELY cool - i found a cucumber this morning. last night i freaked out a little bit desiring cucumbers. i just talked to my mother today about wanting to fix our grocery situation, as it made me cry the other day. in particular i'm distressed with the state of my stomach. and back. i've never liked my back. if there's anything that's ever made me envious about a person it is a nice back.

i started seriously reading 120 days of sodom today, after quite a stretch of owning it and skimming it and reading the odd passage - i'm now out to tackle de sade in a linear fashion.

due to exhaustion and risidual feelings of futility that arouse initially with the hard times experienced over the course of last year, i have not kept up my usual "must look 100% put together at all times" thing. before you think i haven't noticed. it was a totally conscious decision. i became to beat to rise in time every morning to curl my hair. i have been too weary at night to bathe regularly (although this atrocity has since been rectified - i can get along without my hair being curled all the time, but the not bathing just doesn't jive). i want to get out of that. i've decided to. i am going to get my ass up and curl my hair again. i'm going to bathe every night. i'm going to lose weight. i'm going to live up to my full potential for attractiveness.

AND THAT'S QUITE HIGH, MIGHT I ADD. I'M HOTT.

i also have 43645758623 lovely things in my closet that i frequently foresake in favor of large sweaters. simply because my present condition is such that i feel being wrapped in fabric is safer and usually allows for me to sleep in strange places much easier. like a mobile mattress, my one sweater is.

i also need new pants. i could cry about this. i don't care for pants. but my legs have been so cold i need to wear them, and the pair i preferred have met their end (it was about time, actually, they were looking pretty suspect at the ankles, like they'd been ravaged by STDs...and inclement weather). i hate pants. I HATE PANTS. and i hate needing pants.

BUT I LOVE "CELLS" BY THE SERVANT. an instrumental version is played over the "sin city" dvd menu. mmmm.

HAHA. there was a line of dialogue in my screenplay that was "mm" that the read-aloud mechanism assumed was "milimeters". that geeked me out sorely.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11