file this under "h" for haunting

3:45 a.m. x 2008-07-05

currently listening to: "olive green dictionary" by april march

i am proud and sad and happy that i've been where i've been and i've known who i've known and i've done what i've done. sometimes i am compelled to write to people and tell them how i feel when i think about them. the way i slow to a stop and cry, or feel a gust of warm nostalgia that renders me incapable of completing a task. i wonder if they do that when they think about me. i wonder if it would be inappropriate of them to remind them of me, if they forget me. do they not think about me on purpose, or do they, as often as i think about them.

i had a really bad nightmare last night. i am predisposed to intense nightmares, and this one had me wake up crying. it was rotten. my day had a bad start but it wound up all right. i am watching the end of the 4th of july "twilight zone" marathon (OF COURSE). i am making some brilliant progress on my short story. but i think what i need to do most of all is to sleep.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11