we have to drive. it's getting closer - just get inside, it's almost over.

11:26 p.m. x 2009-07-13

currently listening to: "have to drive" by amanda palmer

writing my resume is cheering me up. of all things!

i was helping mark with his and he was getting very blustery and intimidated. i wasn't excited either. it's been hitting me, also, that it isn't very practical to be twenty-two without a resume.

for what i want to do, even now and certainly by the time i graduate, i have quite a bit of valuable experience. my involvement in the student literary journal, the small press, the poetry professor's journal, the portfolio i'm producing in workshop, even the fact that i'm the secretary of the english society makes me feel vital, a feeling i'm lacking in dramatically at the moment. particularly after just coming back from mark's, where he is so great and the atmosphere is so cohesive and manageable.

i made my mother go grocery shopping today and extorted some couscous out of her. i also got a garlic noodle bowl and two batches worth of hummus ingredients. mark and i have made hummus a few times and i'm trying to perfect a recipie of my own. it gave me a very gratifying excuse to buy chili pepper and cumin. at last.

i made the couscous (with garlic and butter) and had that, with blueberries, for dinner, while reading mrs. dalloway, which i may try to finish tonight after continuing to clean up my one short story from the previous workshop. if i do nothing else productive this summer in terms of my own writing (which i should, i'm not that irresponsible), i want to really love both of these stories before i start the ones for this fall. i don't love them now. there's no reason for that.

i also need to get around to reading the issues of poetry professor's literary journal, which he gave me as a thanks for helping him mail the one issue over may term. i'm going to make a list, i think, of things which need read, so i can go about it in a focused and orderly way instead of bopping between mrs. dalloway and catch 22 and feeling guilty all the while about everything else i never read that i own that i must read. like brave new world and fahrenheit 451.

fuuuuck, my resume is ballin!

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11