i love ruining nice things, i really do

6:35 p.m. x 2003-01-20

i must have died alone
a long long time ago
who knows
not me
i never lost control
you're face to face
with the man who sold the world

i don't think i did anything all day @_@ i signed some lovely peoples' guestbooks and i read most of the love you make...and...did i watch donnie darko?! the tape is sitting beside be un-rewound and earlier today it sat, pretty much unwatched in its box. hmm...suspicious indeed...

this is a great book, by the way, the love you make. it's about the beatles (*witholding snarky remark about redundancy*), and it has little to no sugarcoating about them and their lives. i LOVE books like that - that aren't scared to desanctify and reveal the truth. what fun is it to look at people like their perfect? the flaws are what make them interesting and worth writing about! YES - john lennon was a chauvenistic, verbally abusive, drug-addicted sarky bastard and THAT IS WHY I LOVE HIM - i think he'd be damn fun to torment and that is indeed my way to people's hearts ^-^. paul was a bossy little prudish bitch, george was an oblivious, undereducated little voyeur, and ringo...*oh ringo*...like in all things, i don't think we even need to comment. but THAT IS WHY THEY'RE WORTH WRITING ABOUT!!! if they were really four cute little clean cut northern boys i don't think anyone would be as interested. it's the screwy ones that are the most fun. and the things yoko did! i still respect her as an artist and she did make john happier and healthier than he'd ever been - but some of her tactics in grabbing his attention remind me of shannon the anorexorcist.

as the title of this entry implies, i DO like it when "nice" things are fucked-up. i love taking something everyone thinks is one way and showing them the other facet of it. like marilyn monroe, she's a favorite of mine - beautiful, wonderful, lovely woman whose uterus was so scarred from abortions that by the time she was finally ready and able to have one she couldn't because it would invariably miscarry. now - i LOVE marilyn monroe, i'm a big fan and i think she's astounding, but i don't think i'd be as interested in her if she didn't have that dark, shameful edge to her persona.

in the words of courtney love, yay for fuck-up-ed-ness!!!

reporter: so how do you like america?
ringo: so this is america? they all seem out of their minds.
reporter: are you going to get a haircut?
john: we had one yesterday.
reporter: are you part of a social rebellion against the older generation?
john: it's a dirty lie!
reporter: what about the campaign in detroit to stamp out the beatles?
paul: we've got a campaign of our own to stamp out detroit.
reporter: what do you do when you're cooped up in your rooms between shows?
george: we ice skate.
reporter: do you guys hope to take anything home with you?
george: rockafellar center.
reporter: what do you think of beethoven?
ringo: i love him, especially his poems.
reporter: was your family in show business?
john: well me father used to say me mother was a great performer...

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11