but i lie again

6:19 p.m. x 2003-08-29

i don't believe i'll be outing this evening, as it seems i didn't hear from tweak yet. not to mention the fact that i feel completely *blah*. but i woke up at five in the afternoon today determined to loll about incessantly and waste a perfect friday off - at least something has been accomplished. sort of. i made this layout - which i suppose constitutes as an accomplishment of sorts, so my day WAS slightly productive. slightly.

and on top of that i managed to update you with a healthy little rant (see last entry. please, really, go and read it - i won't leave you alone until you do). something recently has ignited my interest in someone, hence my seemingly random lashing-out at crushism. for all you curious onlookers, he is a fairly new interest and his name has yet to leave my lips. i don't wish to release any information about the poor soul at all because i don't really wish to get to know him or harm him in any way, as my affections seem to be the emotional equivalent of flipping the bird. i intend to do my small part to make this boy happy and never let him know i'm aware of his existence. this usually pleases others to a vast extent.

ah well - 'tis all for the best that i didn't go out tonight. tweak and antisocial andy deserve an evening together alone. i'm not one to accompany what could inexplicably evolve into a date - not because i feel left out. and certainly not because i feel jealous. i simply prefer to think that i'm curtious enough to allow to people in love their own space.

*reads what she just wrote* that is such a crock of shit.

but mer, tweak knows i love her. and in case you don't, i love you. and i'm certain i would never meet anyone of interest enough to date around here, so all is right with the world once more.

"don't know why she's in my head
can't figure what it is
but i lie again" - tori amos, "beauty queen"

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11