6:38 p.m. x 2004-09-30
feverish - and extremely, EXTREMELY discouraged. that special kind of discouraged one gets when thrust into a group of people one absolutely does not meld with. it's stupid though, and doesn't matter...because there are so many good things about the upcoming week, like anniversaire de samantha and anti-homecoming. i'm one of very few going to sam's party, i hope other people go because it will be more fun than the alternative.
i really hate getting into a niche with things and having everything go so systematically...which they've been now, you know, wake up in a panic, huff around forgeting several very important things and drink coffee as fast as humanly possible (which also happens to make one quite sick), get on bus, go to school, muse and sleep, spread wrath invariably, eternal trek homeward, channel surf, NAP! (this sucks so much because it isn't a willing nap, if you get what i mean, but i've been passing out every day now - hurrah), wke up, LAW & ORDER: SVU, bit of work, music, writing, sleep. with a little bit of, but not enough, variation at the end.
last night i absolutely had to see this scene in "the cell" before i fell asleep and i felt perfectly composed and all that lovliness, i put it on and for reasons i'm quite sure remain unrelated to jennifer lopez i started getting a little teary and passed the fuck out right as the scene came on (i was quite conscious of it being on, too, and that made me angry).
i have portfolio first block every other day when abby has psych first. i want her class and she wants mine, VICIOUSLY on both ends. i'm not beyond assuming her identity, and i think she feels the same way.
if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start