You gave me hyacinths first a year ago. They called me the hyacinth girl.

i just can't take it personally any more, because it's at that point where i know that it isn't me. i know what i know, i know what i think, i know what i feel, and i know what i must look like to other people because i don't talk about it ever.

it's just easier at this point to let them think i'm addicted to drugs and prostituting myself. i pretty much know what i'm going to hear, but it would be quite the pleasant change to hear somebody ask "how do you feel about it?" and give me the chance to say:

it's my own fucking business.

but one thing i could say to them, the one thing i felt was okay to say that i felt strongly about, very strongly was: kara is a great person. that we can all agree upon.

and i took time tonight to think about that: how much i love kara, catie, katy, clare, tweak, tiffany, paul, heather, manda, amber, ryan, ALIYA, josh, etc...even bethany. i had my mind on love.

some people had their minds on whether or not i smoke rock. but i have to smile about that because...they're old and it's cute.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)