i'm trying to catch a breath through the air of death

11:41 p.m. x 2007-06-07

i wrote a very long, very angry tirade about orientation after i returned from it yesterday, but it deleted itself. gah.

i went with my dad, with whom i shared a very riveting discussion about immegration policies on the way there...and that was about that for interaction...he's a bit steely. the people running orientation were my age, and it got pretty infuriating being treated like a freshman, like two years of my education didn't matter. my advisor, the woman who oversaw the transfer of all of my credits, asked me if i was sure psych was the major i was definite about.

DERRRRRRR. and it has been. for two years.

i had to watch live skits, which resulted in mounting panic. i am scouring the internet, but have yet to find the term for my fear of theatre phobia. gah. after a few hours of discouragement, forced interaction and the pleasant surprise of a very very good cup of coffee - damn fine coffee - i was forced into a "mixer", where i waited ten minutes in line for a smoothie and had a cry in the corner. the smoothie was stunning, actually, and i felt better after talking to my mom, jimmy and lexi. my orientation roommate wasn't a bad kid. it was not all bad, just the bad was really bad on an embarrassing personal level.

i've got social troubles. not to mention theatre troubles. i really didn't want to mention those, hahaha. but i had to tell my advisor, so that i may never be placed in a theatre class. i made it home after an all right sleep and more coffee. good coffee! such a nice surprise! and i got to see lexi and danielle and, in the evening, jimmy. he's very stressed, and i hope that he feels better soon. he's got the weekend in philadelphia to look foreward to, and i have to get down to writing again!

ugh, i had to wake up at nine this morning, was riddled with novacaine and then took a nap. my cheek is distraught.

oh...and i saw my sister graduate. heather, duff and i watched together, and then afterwards i ran into amanda and we had coffee. more coffee. decaf, however. my nerves aren't into caffeine this evening.

i have a scar on my chest in the shape of a kidney bean.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11