2:09 a.m. x 2007-07-20
i just wrote a very cathartic entry, but i had to erase it. i reread it and i thought about it and i realized i just don't know how i feel on the subject yet. or anymore. but then it's not a big issue.
it all boils down to a single point anyhow: intelligent people can educate others when they speak, show-offs only make people feel stupid.
i harbor major hostility towards show-offs, because i am an intelligent person with learning disability. i understand quite the range of concepts but i have to go very slow. i'm a slow learner, especially when i don't care for the subject. i hate teachers and their condescending attitudes. i love to learn but there's many things about the institution of school that bothers me. and rarely, god damn it rarely is there ever a reason to name drop. especially in conversation.
just shove it.
i judge the intelligence of others by their competancy in understanding. special emphasis placed on emotional literacy, because if you can talk yourself blue about postmodern lit and existentialism, all right, i hope your voice isn't too annoying, but if you can do that and you can't understand how the poor person next to you feels when they were crying before you opened your mouth, YOU FAIL. YOU ARE A CERTIFIABLE NITWIT.
it bothered me that on one occasion a friend of mine, who thinks quite highly of her own intelligence, insinuated to me that she was shocked that i went for jimmy because of what different levels we're on intellectually.
which was quite the insult, let me tell you. jimmy is very intelligent in a very different way than i am. i can't do a fucking thing with a computer but type on it. i can't solve basic math. i seriously can't. i am not hardwired for systemizing. i'm pretty impressed that he is. not to mention that he can tell if i need to talk before i ever open my mouth, and how ridiculously dedicated he is to solving any problems i may encounter. RGH!
i just needed to get that out. on the subject of being "hardwired for systemizing", might i suggest to you the essential difference by simon baron-cohen (yes! he is related to sasha baron-cohen) which explores the difference between the stereotypical male brain versus the stereotypical female brain and contains some fantastic insight with regards to autism and its relationship to hypersystemizing (aka, "the extreme male brain"). it's sexy.
also sexy is "donate your bodies to science you fools!" on henry rollin's beautiful spoken word opus "human butt". alex played it for me once on the way to school and i fucking LOVED it and just found a copy of the track today. it's so ridiculously gorgeous. it's about paul, aka crazy paul, aka sky king, who bummed around the washington DC of henry rollins' youth "kicking the awesome science".
i hear henry rollins has a hard time hugging, but were he ever to encounter me, he'd really be in for it. what a man. mmmm.
if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start