i'm not as callous as you think, i barely breathe when you are near

12:19 a.m. x 2009-02-22

currently listening to: "another year" by amanda palmer

sometimes i get frustrated with situations and i think about why. it's usually related to how i approach things. but you know what? that's how i do things. that's how i relate. i would rather be the way i am than any other way.

i am quite compulsively divulgent and prefer the truth to any alternative. i embellish and bend facts but i'm also pretty quick to clarify when i'm doing that, and it's always for the sake of getting the atmosphere of a story across the way i experience it.

that makes me feel incredibly sensitive and vulnerable, but i'd rather know that i did everything i could to let someone else get to know me in all dimensions.

today i went out and bought john fowles' the collector because my mom sent me some extra money and i had a very nice coupon. i went to get some tea at my very favorite cafe, which i haven't been to in months, and when i sat down to read, a band began setting up to play. i sat and watched their whole set and they were incredible! it was such a pleasant surprise! i finished my pot of tea and read the collector in its entirety, in addition to the segment of light in august i had to finish this weekend, which is excellent. i have a reasonably tiny paper to write and an essay to start. i can do it.

i am going home on friday for spring break, during which time i will get caught up on my own writing. my friend bryan might see ken tomorrow, which is crazy. my friend kyle's coming to visit me in a few weekends and wants to buy me groceries, but i am hoping that by the time he gets here that i will have grocieries bought of my own accord.

jimmy's got a stuffed cthulhu for me at home. i need to go home for a while.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11