You gave me hyacinths first a year ago. They called me the hyacinth girl.

currently listening to: "babooshka" by kate bush

i had a catastrophic meltdown and sobbed all night monday. my roommate came up to me after i got out of form & theory yesterday and asked what i was up to at 1. i said, nothing, and she said, you have a new class! she got the professor to sign me into painting! so i ran around and got all the signatures (i had to withdraw from theatre, where i would normally be headed right now) and was able to go yesterday. i'm only missing two classes and one assignment that i can make up this weekend (the professor doesn't mind when i do it, but i'd like it done).

the professor is precious. i had seen him before and i thought he would be more assertive and brash because of his facial hair (it takes a certain kind of person), and when i saw him muttering around, i thought he could potentially be very shy and intimidated by my late entry, having to take me aside and show me what's mine, what i need right now, etc. but he was super controlled and secure, his explanations were fluid and unabrasive - he seemed genuinely ready for the setback, despite having no notice - and he was soberly enthusiastic about my presence. all of this in addition to how lovely his eyes are. i am so far deeply impressed with him.

mary and i are going to the painting room today (there are three classes, but they all go on at once and that's all there is to painting - so we can just leave everything there! so freeing!) in order for me to make an overture to catching up. all i can do right now is prep the canvas with fixative potions and hope the professor is nearby, so we can converse wittily and perhaps discover all kinds of things we have in common that we might do together on dreary, dreary weekends.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)