9:34 p.m. x 2010-09-01

currently listening to: "don't look back" by she & him

i called a conference with him today and ended the ambiguity. he made me "the short films of david lynch" and gave it to me in the big box it comes in from dl's website. and he made me a cover for "dawn of the dead." from out of my puddle i gargled a request to speak to him in private.

i told him: you are pushing major buttons and i need to clear the air, if you are occupied you need to be straightforward with me about it because, this - i -

we're very good.

i get it.

he did not want to hurt me.

i have to step back and consider objectively what the lesson is here: respect myself. don't mire in security. SECURITY IS THE DENIAL OF LIFE! don't ever hide behind something. take responsibility for your actions.

don't ever get into such a situation as he is in. don't ever stop practicing my art. don't lose sight of priorities or humanity.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
JOBJOBJOB
interviewinterviewinterview
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)