poor impulse control

9:29 p.m. x 2003-06-05

today, a few lovely things happened. first - i escaped school after second block ^-^ and went to see my new doctor. he reminded me of nicolas cage in "adaptation", except a bit more chipper. according to him, my other doctor grossly miscalculated how bad my problem was (i will HURT HIM...) and my next surgery will be quite easy and painless ^-^. well finally...

following that, my dad took me to the record store where i stood before the aural sea of sad "billboard" mediocrity and decided to dive in without a life jacket. i don't concider myself an indie snob...i've been stripped of that right after repeatedly singing "fighter" in the bath tub...i'm just overly critical. even with things i enjoy. as i stood before the "new release" rack, i spied a little pale chipmunk-looking girl peering from behind the brian hugh. revenge of evanescence!

it found its way into my hand and followed me all over the store, as i tried frantically to find something else i'd rather hear. i searched and searched to no avail - besides, it was in my price range, even though i ended up being treated @_@.

to those of whome enjoy evanescence: hey, more power to you. i don't hate them - obviously, i bought the cd @_@;;;, but i cannot stand the lyrics. i suppose it's just the emotional state i've happened to stumble blindly into over the past few months - but she sounds so *hopeless*. as in, "i'm fucked - it's over!" hopeless. i hate that. i'm getting to hate that more and more. this young woman is their saving grace, though - she can "sang", but she needs a lyricist team behind her. some of the stupidity hurt my ears...even on my favorite track ("tourniquet").

"i'm pouring crimson regret" - okay, i'm sorry, but - SOMEONE COME UP WITH A MORE CREATIVE EUPHEMISM FOR "BLOOD"! i'm so sick of "crimson this" "scarlet that" - blood is blood and blood is interesting enough in it's emotional symbolism to be described as something other than "red" and "bad".

"imaginary" is alright, though. i'll give them that - i enjoy it immensley and it has the best lyrics on the album. i'll admit though that they are strong musically - there is talent in that band, no question.

the lyrics are just mediocre and that makes my brain itch. i'm a lyrics person and a compulsive critic - it's nothing personal.

*slaps herself* - did you see what i just did? i apologized to an imaginary third party in MY DIARY. i told you i'm the world's doormat. ooo...HOORAY! it's back!!! jackoffjill.com has returned!!!!!!!!!

i'm ordering the humid teenage mediocrity tomorrow, damn skippy...it'll be a nice pickup...but alas, i have only tomorrow and monday then i'm technically done avec grade dix ^-^ !!! so i shall need a new reason to be stressed and need to shop...*ponders*...

while i think of that - you are going to check out joj.com and contemplate what you're going to buy me for christmas.

if anybody should ask i'm going to a seminar
pieces of the moon
sensitive heart, you're doomed from the start
(& etc)

anybody can be just like me, obviously.
not too many can be like you, fortunately.
KL 02-11